Modern Knight

Honor doesn’t exist!
It’s a lie!
A knight in a modern city!
Clashing with everything,
Clashing with itself,
Unable to fit,
Nowhere to park!

We return now to a police chase in progress,
Police chasing a suspect in a full suit of armor
Through the city.
He just jumped over a fence,
And the police took it out behind him-
-I’ve never seen anything like that
In my entire life!
Let’s look to the judges,
Six and a half,
Eight,
And a seven and a half!
Not bad for a police chase.

Sitting in the middle of church,
We return to our knight trying to
pray to his lord and savior
But he can’t stop making so much noise!
What wacky and hilarious adventures!
Why did he bring his horse in a church!
And now the horse won’t stop farting!
Modern Knight will return shortly
After these messages…

Do you need silver polish?
It’s all the rage amongst you knights out there
What do you need silver polish for?
HOW ABOUT A WAR?
That’s right, and if you call right now
You can get glory for free!
Just call the number below
19.99 plus processing and handling!
Order now and receive the
smoothie bloothie ploop pleep thing!
Call now!

We now return to a knight already in progress!
We asked 100 knights
What excuse do you make
When you cancel plans?
There’s a war! 70 points!
Give me knight 1! Give me knight 2!

Pardon the interruption
But we now return to the chase in progress.
The knight seems to have turned around
And is now facing down the police cars!
You can’t find a story like this anywhere
Else in the world than Blurgington!
He’s getting ready to charge the cop cars!
He’s going to joust with them!
Oh my God, his horse is charging!
A knight in a modern city
Is doing the last thing he can think of
To preserve his honor!
What’s the point of this?
Who’s to say?
Is he going to win the joust?
This is it, everyone!