literature

Crossbreed

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Quippers-United's avatar
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Literature Text

The man put salt and pepper in the same container,
and called it Salper.
And the world exploded.
Cows mixed with pigs and became Pows.
They have a beef flavored bacon that is delicious.
Black lights combined with regular lights,
and exploded, creating a shower of glass
and deadly fumes.
Jelly beans mixed with gumdrops,
and really didn’t change at all.
Ketchup mixed with mustard
creating a toxic goo that was
banned by the FDA.
Fun note, the officer who investigated the
substance was nicknamed “Agent Orange.”
Dryer sheets combined with wet wipes,
allowing scientists to discover a new property of matter.
USBs mixed with mini USBs,
which pissed everyone off because now
they didn’t know how to plug anything in.
Cars were crossbred with the motorcycle,
creating a hideous motorized tricycle,
but that had already been invented,
so the creation was scrapped.
The iPhone was crossed with a real phone,
which came out similar to the iPhone,
except people occasionally used the phone now.
Then they realized that there was an iPhone there,
and they stopped using the phone again.
Every international cuisine mixed with
every other international cuisine,
and though nobody is really sure how to describe it,
it tastes a lot like Thai food.
It goes very well with Salper.
Special thanks to StevenGilby stevengilby.deviantart.com/ Who gave the prompt: "Pepper." If you have any simple prompts that you'd like me to use, please put them in a comment on this poem.
© 2013 - 2024 Quippers-United
Comments1
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Chezzy-Am's avatar
I honestly found this poem amusing, sarcastic, and so blatantly bizarre at the same time. The creation of Salper gives birth to a revolution for combining everything (except the tricycle :P or the iPhone) and *dum-dum-dah* CONQUERING THE WORLD *cue M. Bison from street fighter saying "of course"* so anyway, Salper, as an idea actually is revolutionary - the perfect single salt/pepper substitute.

Well taken care of. This is a really awesome poem. :) Cheers.